Daughters . . . .

This is what I woke up to at 7:30 this morning. It's Homecoming Week and in typical Erin fashion, she went all out. The theme, if you couldn't tell, was nerd day. And nerd it up she did. She wanted me to see because she said I'm the best nerd of all..lol. Hack a Nook a couple times and your kids think you are a superhero..lol. 

I wish it was that easy. Being a Superhero. I just try to remind myself that even Superman had Kryptonite. 

I hope one day, when they look back and remember how I failed, that they also realize how hard I tried to be the best for them. The one thing I have realized over the past few weeks is that everything I have done to improve my life has been because of them. I want them proud of me. I want them to know how much I love them. I want them to know I'd never trade a single moment. 

I got lucky. Four girls with their heads on straight. Some say I'm lucky. But that minimizes every single thing I have done to guide them. They have some of my qualities, but luckily, I parented hard enough and prayed even harder for them to not be too much like me. I learned from my own mistakes and passed those lessons on to them. I took what I lacked and made sure they never did. 

Growing up, I rarely heard I love you. So it became some awkward for me to say. So, as an adult, when my mom started saying it, she could never understand why it was so hard for me. But it felt so foreign on my lips. But now, as a parent, I make sure not a single day goes by without those words being spoken to my girls. I only wish now I had allowed myself to walk past the uncomfortableness and said to my Mom more. But again, my failings giving me another lesson to learn. 

I watch my girls and I learn from them. I learn to be less selfish. Less unforgiving. Less angry. Because they have seen and been through things in their life where they should be angry and hateful and selfish. But they aren't. They take what has happened to them and use it to give back to others. 

An anti-bullying/suicide website with lists of resources 

Inviting a friend going through a hard time to church

Wearing buttons showing they are taking a stand against violence and abuse

Donating clothes to the less fortunate 

Pages and pages of prayer requests in their journals 

Erin comes home from school, excited. 

Mommy, mommy, I was the BEST nerd in the whole school. Thank you for being my Mom. 

And honestly, that is the best compliment I have received in a very long time. 

143 to the moon and back, circle three times.....forever and always.